who do you trust? part II

earlier we talked about God’s thoughts on divorce and what Jesus had to say. Jesus proves his bona fides to us in his instructions because he is the good shepherd who laid down his life for us. We thus are forced to believe that he has our best interests at heart when he tells us what he told us about divorce.

Now let’s look for a minute at what Solomon had to say with the wisdom provided to him by God. Proverbs 5 is one of the few extended arguments made by Solomon in the book of Proverbs. It is addressed to “my son” and warns against going after strange women. In these modern times we live in, the warning is also applicable to “my daughter” and should be read also as the danger inherent in going after strange men.

what specifically does Solomon have to say about the dangers of adultery?

For the lips of a a forbidden [1] woman drip honey,
and her speech [2] is b smoother than oil,
4 but in the end she is c bitter as d wormwood,
e sharp as f a two-edged sword.
5 Her feet g go down to death;
her steps follow the path to [3] Sheol;
6 she h does not ponder the path of life;
her ways wander, and she does not know it.

At the beginning her lips “drip honey” but “in the end she is as bitter as wormwood”. Ever think about the fact that after the jolt of fresh infatuation, you will be stuck all over again with a human being. This new human being will have his or her own fresh set of strengths and weaknesses. This new human being will have a whole new set of emotional baggage and hidden minefields. This new human being will get depressed and stressed just like the one you left behind.

lets go on with Solomon

Keep your way far from her,
and do not go near the door of her house,
9 lest you give your honor to others
and your years to the merciless,
10 lest strangers take their fill of your strength,
and your j labors go to the house of a foreigner,
11 and at the end of your life you k groan,
when your flesh and body are consumed,
12 and you say, l “How I hated discipline,
and my heart m despised reproof!
13 I did not listen to the voice of my teachers
or incline my ear to my instructors.
14 n I am at the brink of utter ruin
in the assembled congregation.”

By giving in to adultery, you will be giving your honor to others, you will be giving your years to the merciless and your labors in the house of a foreigner.  At the end of your life you will be consumed and groan about the fact that you neglected wise counsel and did your own thing.

Do you hear what he is saying?  By taking the deceptive path toward what you think will bring you happiness, you are actually heading in the direction that will use you up and leave you empty.  You will have forsaken the ones you love and who love you back for the emptiness of excitement with strangers.  As a promise breaker, you will no longer be trustworthy either to the ones you betrayed or to the new crowd you seek to join.  You will be surrounded by strangers and ruined in front of the assembled congregation.  Everybody will know what you are.

Now lets look with Solomon at the flip side.

Drink o water from your own cistern,
flowing water from your own well.
16 Should your p springs be scattered abroad,
streams of water q in the streets?
17 r Let them be for yourself alone,
and not for strangers with you.
18 Let your o fountain be blessed,
and s rejoice in t the wife of your youth,
19 a lovely u deer, a graceful doe.
Let her breasts v fill you at all times with delight;
be intoxicated [4] always in her love.
20 Why should you be intoxicated, my son, with w a forbidden woman
and embrace the bosom of w an adulteress? [5]
21 For x a man’s ways are y before the eyes of the Lord,
and he z ponders [6] all his paths.
22 The a iniquities of the wicked b ensnare him,
and he is held fast in the cords of his sin.
23 c He dies for lack of discipline,
and because of his great folly he is d led astray.

ahhhh. cool water from my own well. so refreshing. so wonderful. so intoxicating.  If we keep our fountain at home then it will be blessed.  God sees what we delight in.  God has made us in such a way that when we live disciplined lives obeying the teaching that He has set before us, then we are fulfilled and truly happy.  We can choose to be delighted and intoxicated by the spouse of our youth.

think about it.  who knows you better than your spouse?  Your strengths, weaknesses, lessons learned the hard way etc etc.?

You guys went through stuff together.  you signed your first mortgage together with fear and trepidation, but yet trust in God and each other that the future was bright enough to pay it.  You suffered a miscarriage together and went through the agony of lost dreams, still born in the womb.  You then joyfully welcomed that first child into the world and brought it home only to realize that the hospital forgot to provide the instruction book and you have no idea what to do with it.  You learned together how to care for that baby and the ones that followed.  You endured layoffs and unemployment together.   you celebrated that big promotion and the raise that went with it, by buying a new couch and finally getting rid of that eyesore from college days. You moved to a strange city in a strange state together. And so on and so on, through all of life’s twists and turns.

In short, you grew up together with all the joy, pain, boredom, grief, sickness, etc that life brings.  If you decide to turn your back on that, then you put the rest of your life into the hands of strangers who will never know you the way that the spouse of your youth knows you.  If you decide to take delight in the spouse of your youth, then your history remains intact and God approves of your ways.

Do you see it?

Avoid the temptress or tempter.  keep your feet on the path of truth.  God is watching.


7 Responses

  1. […] Comments who do you trust? … on Marriage and Happinesswho do you trust? pa… on who do you trust?who do you trust? … on the Liemore on Justificatio… on […]

  2. Awesome. More like this please.

  3. Thanks, Frank

  4. Good stuff. I particularly like this fact: “after the jolt of fresh infatuation…a human being.” I wonder if ours kids know and understand this truth? I wonder how to communicate it to them. So many folks these days just think the next relationship will be better. It absolutely will be the same or harder!!! I don’t want anything harder than my current relationship, thank you.

  5. Can you put all this in plain english, please? And for those who think their heart is in the right place or it just seems right because marriage shouldn’t be so hard, Jer. 17:9 says that “the heart is deceitful above all things..” Is anyone really shocked when marriage isn’t working so well?! Why else would He have given us such specific instructions for battle?! Eph. 6:10-17 You are not battling your spouse or feelings or pride-the devil is ALL over it!!! Recognize temptation for what it is! And of course it doesn’t happen all at once: wake up, have an affair, or I just don’t love my spouse anymore (only in the movies). Satan knows exactly how to get you when you open the door for him. Tell him “NO!” The Lord is my Rock!

  6. Oops, that was me-not Bryan!

  7. well said Stacy.

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